You're Welcome. =P

I am incredibly blessed to be a part of my church family. I've been realizing that a lot recently, from seeing people from our worship team form bands and perform in the secular world because they are that good [not that music quality should have to take a hit simply because it is in the church - but that's a whole different topic that I really don't have time to get started on], to just listening to recent sermons. I have an amazing support system with solid morals, and I'd like to share it! So here are the links for the two most recent sermons, because God is good, and uses my Pastor's mouth really well. Enjoy =)

The Origional Block Party [7-17-11]
Could This Be Love? [7-24-11]

Lady A

Can't get this song out of my head.

Lyin' here with you so close to me
It's hard to fight these feelings when it feels so hard to breathe
Caught up in this moment
Caught up in your smile

I've never opened up to anyone
So hard to hold back when I'm holding you in my arms
We don't need to rush this
Let's just take this slow

Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight
Just a touch in the fire burning so bright
And I don't want to mess this thing up
I don't want to push too far
Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
So baby I'm alright, with just a kiss goodnight

I know that if we give this a little time
It will only bring us closer to the love we wanna find
It's never felt so real, no it's never felt so right

Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight
Just a touch in the fire burning so bright
And I don't want to mess this thing up
I don't want to push too far
Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
So baby I'm alright, with just a kiss goodnight

No I don't want to say goodnight
I know it's time to leave, but you'll be in my dreams
Tonight
Tonight
Tonight

Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight
Just a touch in the fire burning so bright
And I don't want to mess this thing up
I don't want to push too far
Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
So baby I'm alright, oh, let's do this right, with just a kiss goodnight
With a kiss goodnight
Kiss goodnight

Awakened

For my darling friend, who has a graceful heart and clean soul.

Awakened

And there she is - liquid eyes
All memories and broken heart
Ah there she is

"I've been waiting for you my lovely, my delight"

And as she cries her heart comes alive,
As tears carve skin, she's home again
There is truth, there is beauty

There is love and daring, there is open honesty

Passion, sadness, desire, healing,
In a handful of tears
Raw and wild and dear.

"There is my daughter, there is her breath. There is my dearest, her well-loved heart"

Sweet girl, darling friend-

You are no longer a slave to the Darkness
You are no longer a product of selfishness
You do not belong to fear
You do not belong to hatred.

"I claim this girl, my child, my heart - No force can steal her from me, no force can take her from my love"

You are His.

Stick Figure Illistration

^ This is Phil. I trust Phil ^

^ This is Phil and Steve. Phil trusts Steve ^

^ This is me and Steve. I do not trust Steve ^

Does this make my trust in Phil a mistake? Or Phil untrustworthy?

Maybe there is no answer.

You and me, me and you, both of us - togetheeeeerrr!

A friend of mine posted:

"Why do people freak out that i have never had a boyfriend??? I just haven't found one who likes me back. plain and simple."

I've expressed a similar sentiment more times than I can count over the years, especially in YWAM, when I was in cultures that couldn't fathom a young gal not having a young guy by her side.

Seriously - there is SO much stress on it in many other cultures - even if it feels like it's underlined and italicized in bold here, it's worse in more traditionally centered cultures.

Not trying to knock my friend's pondering at all here, I totally get what she's saying. And yes, it can be frustrating. I know people are well meaning, they want me to find the same love and joy in a partner the way they have. Or at least I assume that's their goal here.

But there's a definite sting when it's said, because the fact is, like my darling friend points out, that there just hasn't been a guy that I've had a mutual "likeage" with. Either I like him or he likes me, but only a very few times has there been a two way street. And those panned out to be less mutual than previously stated - or assumed - or whatever.


I'm not heart broken or wounded from these, so please don't mistake this for a pity blog or even whining.
Well, maybe I am whining a little - but I don't mean to =P

Anyhow, what I really want to get at here is that in the past whenever things like that were said, or someone wanted to set me up with some guy [which, btw, I think is lame. Introduce us, yes - but as far as an actual "set up" or "date" the guy had better be man enough to ask the gal himself.] [maybe that's personal preference, but from the conversations I've had with other girls, it doesn't seem to be...]


ANYHOW - geeze I'm tangent-y tonight.


Before when people wanted to set me up with someone I'd laugh it off and change the subject.

But now, for the first time, I feel ready to actually be in a relationship. For the first time I feel like I have something to offer, like I could make the person better, and he could make me better. I feel like we would be more awesome together than on our own.

Of course I've wanted to be with guys before - I did go through hormone filled teen years. But that was hormones and insecurity. This is more...logical maybe.


This isn't all to say I've got my eye on someone or something - because I haven't.
It's mostly just what was sparked by reading my friend's post.


I am happy as I am - single - because my Lord gives me joy.
But I think I could be something more with a Godly man.


My mom [who is very much in love with my dad] said once, "I ride my own white horse!" Which I think I agree with. I don't need to be saved from anything, I'm a fighter and I like being able to take care of myself.


Any guy who thinks I'm just waiting to be protected and have all my battles fought for me has another thing coming indeed =P 
But I would like a partner.


Maybe he'd be more like my sword - I hold him in a sense, but he goes before me and I'd be a way crappier knight without him.


Maybe that's a bad analogy. Whatever.


Bed time, night <3